Trying to be a bit brighter

My blog has been bloody miserable the last few entries hasn't it. I'm trying to look for the silver lining...be more upbeat. More positive. So here are some good things.

Oz had a brilliant birthday party. Had his face painted pink (wouldn't let them do anything else), got a binbag full of pressies (which I've hidden till Friday - his real birthday), played with his friends, had a big cake. Fab day. My dad came which was wonderful. Lots of friends were there - it was a bit hectic! But a really good party. Oz is completely confused now as to when his birthday is but I'm sure he'll work it out on Friday when he's buried under a ton of fabulous gifts. Thank you to all who came or sent cards or pressies to the lucky brat. Much appreciated.

Potty training. We're bribing him with sweets which isn't ideal but sod it - it's working. Perfect day today - no accidents at all. He's even been going to the toilet on his own when we're out at play places. We're going to gently wean him off the sweets soon but at the moment it's working so I ain't changing it. He's brushing his teeth a bit more. And he's at no risk for obesity at the moment - the kid is skinny as a rake.

Toby. Right. On Monday night I decided I couldn't do the 4 times a night waking anymore and I was going to leave him to cry. I remember getting to this stage with Oz and one night leaving him cured him - he slept through after that. I hate doing it - I'm not a Gina Ford fan. But I'm too exhausted to do pick up put down (and Toby's too bloody heavy) and I need to teach him to sleep and go to sleep on his own. So Monday night - he woke at 3.30 as per usual and I didn't go in. He cried on and off until 4.30. Woke again at 5.30 when I went in and fed him. I had a doctor's appointment on Tuesday morning. I looked like hell as I hadn't slept much. I've got an infected toe and a chest infection. Doc basically told me I looked like shit and that I needed to get more sleep as my immune system was low. She asked about Toby's sleep patterns and bedtime routine. She suggested that I not breastfeed him last thing - to feed him THEN bath him, read him a story and put him down. Obvious isn't it.....She also reassured me that leaving him to cry was a good idea - he doesn't need feeding at night.

It's funny - she's almost given me permission in my head.....so last night I fed him, Rob bathed him, then we read Goodnight Moon, I sang Godspeed by the Dixie Chicks to him as I cuddled him and put him down. He wasn't best pleased. Cried for half an hour. I was strong - cooked dinner and hung washing - kept myself busy - while listening to him wail on teh monitor. Rob told me to turn it off but I felt I had to listen out for him. He stopped and went to sleep. I checked on him half an hour later and he was peaceful and sweet looking.

He woke up at 5.30. That's the LONGEST he's ever slept. So we're doing it tonight. And as I type, it's been 10 minutes since I shut his door and he's asleep already. So as much as I slag Ms Ford off, it does work. And as long as I keep ignoring the NSPCC ad that plays in my head (Nicholas has learnt that no one comes when he cries....that one) then I think it's worth it. Toby is still his happy cheerful self all day - more so - and I don't feel like a zombie.

Mum and Dad are off visiting my sis in America and I do miss them already. But Rob is off this week which is a help. I escaped today and went to Victoria Station for lunch - classy eh? But I had a discount voucher for Yo Sushi to use so I had a leisurely lunch alone. Which was lovely. Course came home to a very stressed hubby....but it was worth it - welcome to my world.....

Looking forward to Oscar's birthday on Friday. We're going to take him to the Build A Bear Workshop as they have a triceratops you can make - I think he'll love it. And I'll let him open a present every half hour and probably will still have some left over! Tomorrow I get a lie - in as Rob is here, and they we're going to Catford to buy the other part of Oz's present - a scooter.

I've been neglecting my friends, my work and my phone and emails for a few days so apologies to all. I'm fine - honestly. And thank you to those who have rung, emailed or even offered to pray for me (go ahead Beege - I'll take all the help I can get!). I'm thankful for your friendship all of you.

I'm going to endeavour to brighten up and might even try and tell a joke next post.....!