Oscar and the bump

Kirsti took these...love em....

(as you can see - he now takes his guitar everywhere with him....)

K and Terry leave for home tomorrow and will be sorely missed - by Oscar most of all.....

My Mum has offered to take Oz tomorrow night which means Rob and I get New Years Eve together as a twosome...god knows when we'll have that opportunity again. As you can see, I'm not up for dancing the night away - we've booked a table at our fave Japanese/Chinese restaurant and will have a quiet dinner in peace. Then I'll probably be in bed before midnight.

I keep thinking how different everything is going to be next year. It's exciting and scary all at the same time....so many things happened this year - getting pregnant, starting the lab, teaching Monkey Music....I was very lucky personally and had no real bad times in 2006 - it was a great year.

So here's to 2007. The year that I have childREN!

A Very Merry Musical Christmas

Ah it's all about the kids isn't it - this is the first year we've really experienced Christmas with a concious Oscar. From the moment he opened his stocking and saw the amount of sweets in it....we were laughing so hard! He couldn't believe his luck - he got toy dinosaurs, cars, a motorbike, tons of sweets and a train in his stocking.

Then we went to my parents and he was an angel - slept right through our Christmas dinner - I had mashed potato for the first time in 9 months - bliss - and then woke up as we finished our christmas pud - so we had a lovely peaceful dinner. Then we opened presents as we do in our house after lunch. He got some wonderful gifts on a mainly musical theme - a guitar from us, a trumpet from my sister and a keyboard from his grandparents. He's in heaven.

A thoroughly wonderful day. Here's a montage (my first!)


Christmas 2006

My favourite picture

Oz had some photos taken at nursery - I'll post more when it's not nearly bedtime...

this is my favourite - cheeky urchin!

Oscar met Santa....and the carol concert footage

Finally found the pics that Kirsti put on my computer - well here's Oz and Santa (he's telling Santa to look at the penguin)
And here on YouTube is Oscar's carol concert - he just wouldn't sit still! He's on the far right, front row in case you didn't spot him...with his santa hat on! (it's a bit long and I won't be insulted if you don't watch it all!)

Hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!

Decision....

Had another hospital/scan/midwife appt this morning. I knew it would be confirming the decisions I made with the consultant 2 weeks ago. First off - baby is normal size again - around 6lbs which is fab. Everything good. My levels aren't brilliant but they're ok and obviously baby is still not being affected too adversely so I'm pleased.

Then the midwife explained a bit more about the possible waterbreaking/induction and how the labour would go if I managed to go into labour. The consultant had said I'd be monitored a lot during it. But the midwife also said I'd be on a drip the whole time to monitor my sugar levels and give me insulin. And I'd probably be bed bound realistically - and therefore almost certainly have an epidural as it's more painful that way. I wouldn't be able to walk around or move. I'd be stuck on a bed.

Exactly what I don't want. I know I wanted to avoid a caesar at all costs but the idea of labouring on a bed for hours, with no ability to move or anything....it's not what I want. It's up to me - they may not be able to break my waters anyway so it may be a moot point. I may just have the planned caesarian anyway. But at the moment I'm scheduled to go in on the Sunday night to be "induced". I think I'm going to tell them not to bother trying. And put away my raspberry leaf and clary sage. I don't want to labour like that.

I was so terrified of the recovery for the caesarian. But as I learn more and make more contingency plans, it's not going to be that bad - I'll cope. I recovered fast from the emergency one and the recovery from a planned one is always easier. I've already put things in place for care of Oscar - like staying in nursery for full days for a few weeks rather than half days. Asking for help from friends. I think it will be fine. And it's only a few weeks.

Of course if I sponataneously go into labour before the 7th then so be it. But I'm not going to try and start it. No fresh pineapple or curry (or sex - Rob is so disappointed).

I'm 90% sure this is what I want - what do you think?

It's Oh So Quiet...shhhh shhhhh

Morning! It's twenty past six in the morning and the house is sooo quiet and lovely. I'm wide awake and thought instead of lying very uncomfortably in bed, I'd come downstairs and have some tea....and catch up on everything.

It's Day ?..of the builders being here....erm...I can't count cos my brain isn't working - but the builders have been in over a week now. The portaloo is still in place but we're hoping to have the toilet back in on Thursday. The house is covered in dust. I've been having to go out all day, every day. The bath is in, the tiles are nearly done, the floor (amazing floor) is down....we're getting there. It'll be worth it...but I'm fed up of peeing in a bucket.

Sunday - my in-laws came to visit. They have only been once since Oscar was born so last time they saw him, he was a baby in arms (Rob isn't very close to his family). It was an utter joy to see how enchanted they were by their grandson. I hope we'll see them more now....

My sister and her partner Terry arrived on Monday - oh happy day - as did my Dad. Oscar thinks it's Christmas already. with all this family! On Monday I had to drag him to the car to bring him home at the end of the day - he didn't want to leave!

My sis brought me a suitcase full of goodies from America - some I can have now, some for post-nondiabetic me. And some beautiful things for the baby - little fleecy babygrows with zips up the front not poppers - SO much easier - why don't they do them in England....?

Yesterday Oz was at nursery - I took Rob to take his driving theory test in the morning - he passed! Now he promised, before the baby came, to learn to drive and give up smoking. Has he? Has he hell. The only reason he did his theory test is because I booked it for him. He's yet to have a single lesson in a car. But he passed! So that's something. I'm taking bets on whether or not he'll have to take it again before his driving test as I think he's only got 2 years before it runs out.....

K and Terry (bless their hearts) came over after lunch to help me tidy the house. I say help. I lay on the bed and directed really. I had braxtonhicks all day yesterday - in fact got a bit worried at one point that I might be going into labour! Not comfortable. I didn't have BH with Oscar - certainly not like this. I didn't think you got them in second pregnancies....or maybe it's because of my caesarian scar - I feel them more.....they eased eventually.

In the afternoon it was Oscar's carol concert. His first public performance - my first of many moments sitting in an audience on a chair that's made for a 2 year old, grinning my head off. He was the kid (there's always one) that wouldn't sit down - kept coming for a cuddle between songs then sitting back down again...led the applause at the end of each song (he loves to clap) and didn't sing much but when he did was the loudest. Terry took some footage - I'll make sure I post it when I can - it was tooooo cute!

Mum bought us all sushi dinner (I know you shouldn't when you're pregnant but I don't care) so we feasted on salmon and tempura handrolls and maki and edamame and it was yum.

Today Oscar's being allowed to bunk off school as the aunties want to take him to see Santa - we haven't done that this year yet. He's awake now - it's 6.40...peace shattered. But I got to write up my last few days.

I haven't been commenting on everyone's blogs but I'm reading and sending love!

Goodbye John...hello Jude

It must be pregnancy hormones. Last week I was lusting after Signor Barrowman...today I saw The Holiday and now have a huge roaring crush on Jude Law!! Now I've never seen the appeal before - seen him in quite a few things but he always came across as quite weedy. And a tad slimey.

But in The Holiday - ohmigod. His character is swoonsome - the ideal romantic man - charming, self deprecating, gorgeous (especially in his glasses) and totally unexpectedly wonderful- I won't say anymore as I don't want to spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet but it's a perfect chick christmas flick. And he and Cameron Diaz have very good chemistry.


It felt quite decadent to go to the cinema on a Tuesday afternoon - Julie and I went as the LAB wasn't on this week as we closed for christmas and this was our christmas treat.

My only problem with the film - Cameron and Jude were like the "beautiful" couple -and Kate Winslet and Jack Black were the frumpy but nice couple - Kate Winslet - Frumpy? I'm sorry - she's just as glam and gorgeous as Cam.....

But it's a fabulous feelgood film. Oz was at nursery all day so I had a lovely time (I'm such a bad mother). Spent the morning in Ikea with Mum buying amazing accessories for the bathroom, then met Julie for lunch and movies, quick stop at Starbucks for my eggnog latte and picked Oz up from nursery. Then Rob was home 3o minutes later.

Oscar is currently being bathed - like the used to be as a baby - in the baby bath in front of the fire in the living room. He sits in it like a chair now and Rob has taught him to say "bring me my pipe and slippers". Then he was lying barenekkid on a towel in front of the fire - so so cute. I couldn't find the blasted camera or I'd have bored you with shots - I'll try and find it and take some tomorrow.

Portaloo is still in place. Bucket worked a treat (Rob emptied it for me this morning - that's love that is). It's bloody cold though using it this evening - and still surreal having a pee when you can hear people walking on teh pavement 10 feet away.....bathroom progress has been made - the toilet soil pipe has been moved and the toilet is in there - not plumbed in yet but I think they're working as fast as they can to get it plumbed in.

On the downside they discovered our central heating pump is on the verge of collapse so we need a new one - rather found that out now than when it failed when the baby was here - but an expensive addition. (Not that I'm paying for it thanks to my amazing parents).

My amazing parents have also decided to fork out an extra few quid so I can have a pump installed to give me a superamazing power shower - I had a shower at Mum's this morning and it was so wonderful it made my whole head zing - and so Mum rang the builder and got him to get one for my bathroom.

I'm so damn lucky. I know. I appreciate them I really do. I sound like a spoilt princess don't I - and I suppose in a lot of ways I am.

So here's to amazing folks, amazing hubby, cute kids and Jude Law....what a combo!

The new bathroom - DAY 1

NOT a great day. Waited in for the builders to arrive - I was expecting them at 8am - they got here at 11 - by which time Oscar was literally bouncing off the walls - I usually go out with him by 9 on a Monday and he had a ton of energy.

Drove to Bromley with the idea of leaving Oscar to play happily in the creche while I did some christmas shopping via Starbucks for an eggnog latte.....no luck. ALL the car parks were full! On a Monday at 11.15am? And schools still running? NO idea why. So I drove around or rather got stuck in lots of traffic...and Oscar fell asleep. Bugger.

So it's 11.30 - I think - drive to Mum's - put Oscar down there like I planned and have a nap myself (didn't sleep well last night) then go out earlier this afternoon - we'd planned to meet friends at the museum. Got to Mum's. Carried Oscar up 2 flights of stairs which hurt. As soon as I laid him down - he woke up. And wouldn't go back to sleep. Goodbye naptime for both of us and I REALLY needed one.

45 minutes later I gave up. Put him back in the car and drove to Gambado - the soft play place. He was so tired but refused to sleep. Had about 8 tantrums. Pushed and slapped some other children. Slapped me.

At 3.15 I drove to Mums again to pick up something I'd forgotten and ended up in tears because I couldn't park properly - yes I was just as overtired as the 2 year old - and hormonal!

So my angel mother put me to bed and entertained the child for an hour. We drove home to find out portaloo installed and my bathroom gutted. They did so much in one day - makes me hopeful...

I haven't been brave enough to use it yet. It's in the front garden - yes - on the main road - they couldn't get it in the back.....

I've bought some air freshener - one of those fan ones - to keep it "fresh". How fresh is a chemical toilet...*shudder*. Rob has used it - said it wasn't too bad....

Confession - I've bought a bucket for the night-time (though god knows the logistics of that one - can't exactly sit on it at 8 months pregnant). Oh god. The glamour. It will all be worth it....I hope!

On the upside - Mum came up with the idea of funky flooring - so I'm getting tiles from Harvey Maria - click on the lifestyle range -we're going for water.....so the bathroom itself is pure white tile and the suite is white....with that floor. I think it will look amazing.

My lovely hubby

Rob has been working like a demon today. We made a start on Oscar's new room ages ago - the bed basically - but his clothes were in the baby room still. I hadn't got any of the baby clothes out of the attic - hadn't done anything baby-wise to prep.

I've been worrying about packing my hospital bag for a while now....and realised I haven't got anything to pack. So today my lovely husband has cleared, tidied, sorted, put things in the loft, got things down - made it all ready for me to go through the boxes of baby clothes later tonight and get organised.

Since I got 2 weeks shaved off my due date as it were, i've been getting more neurotic. And he's realised this so made it his business to slave today to make me happy. And I'm so grateful.

So three cheers for Rob!

pregnancy update

Had a good hospital appointment this morning with a fab consultant. Plus a scan. Good news on the scan - baby boy is normal size - exactly as he should be and measuring as if I haven't got diabetes which I'm really happy about - makes all the hard diet work worth it. (btw my bloods are still not under control - I'm taking a ridiculous amount of insulin before bed and my fasting blood is still way too high - but at least it isn't affecting baby yet)

I have three options for delivery now after talking with the consultant. In an ideal world - I go in to labour naturally at around 38 weeks - ie 5th January - she recommended LOTS of sex so that's Rob's christmas present sorted. She said even if I'm labouring naturally, they'll monitor me a lot more than a "normal" labour - I'll be on that bloody monitor most of the time and baby will probably have a scalp monitor attached (Oscar did - it didn't seem to bother him) - this is because they have to keep an eye on my caesarian scar and the best way to check the strength of contractions is through baby's heartbeat....all being well I'll push the little sucker out no problem.

Plan B - I don't go into labour naturally but my cervix is soft at 38 weeks and baby's head has begun to engage. They'll break my waters to start me off. They can only do this if the head is down as if it isn't, the cord comes down before the baby and makes everything difficult. Now, Oscar's head never enagaged properly which isn't a great sign - but you never know - every pregnancy is different. And this baby is currently smaller than his big brother was at this stage.

If neither of the above are possible - they'll section me at 38 weeks - this is cos my blood sugars aren't behaving and because they do that if you've had a caesar previously.

So whatever happens - I'm going to have this baby about 2 weeks before I thought I would. Which is a relief.

Cross your fingers/pray/chant - do whatever you do - that I go for option A and labour normally. I've bought my rasperry leaf and will start taking it just after New Years I think to help it along.....

Sad day....

One of my oldest friends lost her father last weekend. And the funeral was today. Her mother died two and a half years ago and now her Dad is gone. I can't imagine the pain of being an orphan at 36 years old.....

She asked me to go to the funeral which I was really glad to do - to be there for her and to say goodbye to her wonderful Dad. I've never really been to a proper funeral (that's what comes from a non-religious family). The two I attended were my grandparents and they were very simple, non religious cremations - sad but very short. This was an absolutely beautiful service - an hour of eulogy, hyms, readings. All three of the children were supposed to read - my friend's eldest brother managed to read his but broke into tears many times. The middle brother and my friend both got their partners to read for them as they were so upset. Grandchildren read their memories, we laughed and smiled at the stories. And wept.

I cried all the way through. I mean I cry at adverts at the moment - and this was a wonderful emotional remembrance of an amazing man. I remember him as always smiling, joking, always interested in you, such a warm wonderful man. He was from Belfast and his voice always reminded me of my childhood time in Belfast.

My friend's heart is broken and I ache for her and her family. And I'm glad I was there today cos I got to give her a big hug. But I'm exhausted - emotionally and physically. A long drive there and back.

So raise a glass, have a thought for Bill who was laid to rest today - a wonderful charismatic man, a truly humble and proud father and grandfather. Reunited with his wife again. And probably smiling down on us and sending us psychic tips on good horses to bet on (he placed three bets the day he died - and two won - my favourite anecdote from today)

It's embarrasing but....

I've been meaning to confess this for ages.....

Ever since "How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria" and the first series of Dr Who, i've had a seriously huge lustcrush on John Barrowman.

Now the man has been knocking around on British Tv and Theatre for ages....from doing naff Live and Kicking stuff to singing and dancing. And he's never appealed. But Captain Jack on Dr Who...and when he snogged the finalists on Maria....he's suddenly incredibly sexy. And I've got dreams to prove it. Phew.

Imagine my surprise when someone mentioned a while ago that he was gay. Now I read Heat magazine every week. I read showbiz gossip on the internet. I consider myself to have a finger on the pulse of celeb life....but I had NO idea! Honest! I feel like an imbecile!

I didn't believe it. Until he started mincing about with Simon Amstell on Nevermind the Buzzcocks the other week.

I'm absolutely devastated. I mean I should have guessed. He's GORGEOUS. He's funny. He's sexy. He sings showtunes for chrissake. But I had no no clue....

Is it just me? Am I seriously being blonde here?

Still a girl can dream.......

**((edited to add....Moxie - go easy on the pisstaking....))**