You asked for it...

Cos I promised Moxie - not that I look half as gorgeous as she does in these....remember, I've had a rough week. Here's my bump

Close up!

My bump 

In praise of my Mum

She's been amazing today. We went to the docs - Oz is ok- it's just a virus (that's what they always say) and he seemed cheerful enough - he just sounds dead croaky. I was told to drink lots and not to worry about baby being affected by my liquid bowels (sorry).

Then I went to Mum's. She had Oscar from 10.30 until 5pm, enabling me to go home and sleep - I'm so weak and tired. I picked him up - he'd had such fun - and brought him home. Then she came round at 7 and put him to bed for me. She was so amazing - I don't know what I'd have done today without her.

While Mum was putting Oz down (another battle like yesterday) the diabetic midwife rang me back - and reassured me that my levels weren't bad at all. That it wouldn't be as easy to control this time as it was last time and that I mustn't panic. And I MUST eat. Especially carbs. If I don't eat any carbs or sugar, my body produces it itself which is one of my main problems - my fasting blood is high because my body is dumping sugar from my liver. She said if my morning levels continued to be high to ring her on Monday and she'd put me on insulin on Tuesday instead of waiting till my scheduled appointment next Friday. She told me not to worry about baby's lungs -that she had to inform me of all the risks involved in diabetes but that baby is not under that risk at the moment.

I did reassure her that I was normally quite sane and rational - I think I'm just over-tired and stressed. Which, as Dix said, would raise my blood sugar more! She suggested I eat more, maybe take up yoga!

So I feel better. I did eat something tonight - again courtesy of my supermum, a falafel and some pasta (carbs!). I'll measure my blood later.

Have been trying to ring Rob all day but he's not in his hotel room. Hopefully I'll get hold of him tomorrow.

So I still have stomach cramps and dodgy bowels but I'm going to teach tomorrow (I need the money!) and see how I am. Oz can go to nursery the doctor said. So hopefully I'll be back on track. And Mum has again offered to be around tomorrow afternoon if I need her.

So mum - if you're reading this (and I know you sometimes do). I wish I could express better how grateful I am. And how amazing you are. And I love you. As does your grandson.

Just a quickie

Thank you for the hugs and kind words. Though it seems my luck isn't in this week....Oscar slept through all night with no problems but has woken up with a croaky voice and a barking cough. And I had stomach ache last night and now have the worst diarrhoea (sorry). So I rang my monkey music boss at 7.30 and cancelled - which means I've let down a load of mums but I couldn't teach today. Feel weak as a kitten and very sick.

I had some poached salmon for my dinner last night. And an omlette for lunch. That's all I ate yesterday so it's one or t'other.

We're off to the docs at 10 - mainly for Oz but I just want to check the protocol for sickness that isn't morning related in pregnancy.

Joy!

And another one...

I know! Doesn't post for weeks then 3 in one day. I think cos Rob isn't here, I haven't got anyone to talk to....

Just had a massive blub fest on the phone to my Mum. She's been away in France for the weekend - I normally talk to her once a day! So I missed her. And filling her in on the midwife and the diabetes and the psycho bedtime I sort of lost it.

I'm more scared than I admitted about the diabetes. My blood levels have been very high this weekend. Or I think they have - I'm not really sure. It isn't as easy to control as last time. The only way I've kept my bloods below 6.8 today is by not eating hardly anything. Which I know isn't good. But I'm scared to eat! The midwife freaked me by telling me that if baby is exposed to consistent high bloods, it can harm his lung development. And I've only been testing since Saturday morning but as I said - couldn't get my levels below 6.8 and peaked at 8.6 (I'm supposed to be between 4 and 5 in the morning and below 7 after meals)

I left a message for the midwife to call me - I rang her yesterday morning - but haven't heard from her. I'm going to ring again tomorrow after Monkey Music.

I'm just feeling tired and tearful. I'm going to go to bed now I think....just wish I could stop blubbing.

Send me a cyber hug?

Just my luck

Another post...forgot to mention earlier - Rob has gone to Utah this morning for a week so I'm home alone with the bairn until Sunday -which I hate....

Today has been a good and bad day - we actually had bookings at the LAB (HOORAH) but then had to cancel because all - yes ALL of our therapists let us down at the last minute. Something to do with London Fashion Week....grrrrrr.

But on the upside we went to Kings Hospital where all our yummy mummies give birth and had a really great meeting with the head midwife. She's going to distribute all our leaflets to parenting classes and to the community midwives to give to expectant mothers. Fab.

Rest of the day was sorting out contracts and stuff with Julie. Picked Oscar up from nursery and it looked like he'd been in the wars - scratches on his face where I think he walked into a bush and a nasty scrape on his arm. Because my little man is so tough, he didn't cry so the nursery only noticed the marks and have no idea how he got them. When asked, he said he fell over in the garden.

He was also EXHAUSTED. He woke up 3 times last night crying - hasn't done that for ages and I've no idea why. He won't sleep when he's at nursery and they think that's why he was so clumsy and hurt himself. His little eyes were red but he WOULDN'T go to bed tonight.

Rob does bedtime - always has. And tonight it was going well - he and I had a good shower time, dried off, read 2 stories and then I gave him some medicine cos he's a little warm and has a cough. Then into bed and lights out.

And he freaked! Screamed. I left him as I usually do for five minutes but THEN - a first. He climbed out of the cot and came into the office. I picked him up and said in my best supernanny voice "it's bedtime baby" and put him back. He got out again. Now this is getting out from a cot with barred sides almost as high as he is - in a sleeping bag so he's got no foot leverage. So I said "bedtime" and put him back. He got up again. This time I didn't speak and put him back.

10 attempts later he's so hysterical and a bit bashed from the falls out of the cot that I pick him up and give him a cuddle. He clings to me! Absolutely beside himself. We have a rock in the chair and then finally I put him down again and he resists - clinging onto my arms. I prepare myself for another round but as I close the door he's gone all quiet. And that was 10 minutes ago.

He usually goes down easily - a few whimpers possibly but easy. That's the hardest EVER.

Why? Possibly because he misses his Daddy. If so then god help me for the rest of the week cos it'll only get worse.

ARGH!!!!!!!! I'm usually counting the minutes until Rob gets home from work so I can breathe and relax. Especially in the second half of the week with teaching every day. And I'm flying solo. 6 months pregnant with a suddenly psychotic 2 year old who is suicide leaping out of his cot.

Suggestions?

When Squirrels Attack....

Yes it's true - I got mugged by squirrels yesterday. Oz and I were walking to our car which was parked underneath an oak tree. Oscar was chasing a squirrel a little bit in a 2 year old toddly way. Squirrel went up tree....and proceeded to chuck acorns at us! They were bouncing off the roof of the car with force!!!

I had no idea that these little buggers were so vicious! I narrowly escaped being struck on the head and I'm surprised there isn't a dent in the roof.

Who knew eh?

Surprise surprise

My Glucose Tolerance Test results came in and I have higher than normal blood sugar. I've been expecting this really - it's why I started monitoring my bloods as soon as I found out I was pregnant. I haven't been an angel but I've been basically sticking to a low GI diet as much as possible...

So - I saw the diabetic midwife (she deals with it but she hasn't got it!) who I saw in my last pregnancy. It was nice to catch up but she had some sobering news for me. Because I've been diagnosed earlier in my pregnancy than last time, it's worse news - for baby really more than me. I may have to go on insulin this time - to not go into it too much, I have really high blood sugar in the morning. Overnight my body seems to produce sugar - even if it's low before I go to bed, it's high in the morning. I am fine during the day - it's just my fasting blood that's high.

This happened last time too and the way I dealt with it was to eat something before I went to sleep. So I'm going to try it again for a couple of weeks and see if I can control it - otherwise it's injections for me....

Also - they won't induce me which is what I wanted to hear - but what they will do is a caesarian if I don't go into labour naturally before my due date. The whole reason I started monitoring my bloods so early was to avoid another caesar. I really wanted to try and do it naturally. I can't imagine having a caesarian and a 2 1/2 year old! And last time I had my sister around doing everything for me which was amazing. That won't happen this time.

The midwife told me an elective caesar is much easier than an emergency - your body isn't exhausted by labour so your recovery is often quicker. And psychologically it isn't as shocking - you know exactly when your baby will come, you can arrange childcare, prepare and everything. And it won't hurt! Well, recovering from it does but it won't be like labour.

But a wierd part of me enjoyed labour last time - it was amazing what my body went through and how I coped. I did 9 hours before i had an epidural and never got to push. And i really would like to experience that. This is my last "chance" to birth a baby.....

Am I being nuts? Possibly. But it's how I feel.

Thank you for the name suggestions - we're keeping them all in mind! 2Bee is a real wriggler - especially during Monkey Music classes. Besides the diabetes all is well - I'm just hectic busy and tired which is why I am so crap at posting and keeping up with everyone too...

Just a quick thank you

I'm about to go to bed - so tired! But I just wanted to say thank you so much to all of you who commented on my last 2 posts. Made me feel much better, much loved and much supported.

I'm getting my head around my little men now. And looking forward to daughters-in-law and granddaughters!

Names....ah well - there's a task for you - what do you think? We like Archie, Nathan, Alexander, Isaac (after Newton, not the bible) - Rob still likes Odin (which was what he wanted to call Oscar !!!) but I'm TOTALLY up for suggestions - we won't name him till we see him. Oscar was never on our list with the first pregnancy - it was all a big joke (the only way I'd get an Oscar was to give birth to one) but it suited him once we met him.

So please - inundate me with ideas! I like original but not too wacky - like Oscar I suppose!

Thank you again my lovely blogmates.

Our little boy...

It's a .....

Thank you for your votes.....

It's a BOY...blue blue blue

And I must admit I'm a bit blue about it too....but I'll get over it. Just the thought that I'll never have a daughter makes me sad - we won't have another one - we can't afford to and knowing my luck I'd end up with 3 boys!

I keep thinking of little girls at ballet class, of "Are You There God It's Me Margaret", of my child bearing a child - I'll never be Mother of the Bride...I'll never share girly chats with my own girl...Rob is sad too - he wanted a little Daddy's girl.

And I know for all of that there's a ton of boy wonderfulness - but I woulda liked one of each....

I was disappointed last time and I am disappointed this time and this time I'll be disappointed for a little bit longer and I'm not going to beat myself up about it.

He's happy and healthy. And not as big as Oz was which is good news.

But he's not a she. Goodbye daughter dreams...

Curse of the black tongue

He ate the wheel of the fire enging - PURE sugar. Pure black tongueness

Demolishing the Fireman Sam cake (Sam, the birthday boy is on the left) 

Hello...remember me?

I know. I haven't time to fart these days....let alone blog.

And I haven't taken any pics though I meant to. I've taken some of Oscar though! But blogger is being an arse when I try and upload them so I'm going to use Hello so they'll be on the post above...

I had something to say by blogging....erm...Oh YES!!

I have my scan on Wednesday.....where I should find out if 2Bee is pink or blue....and I want your guesses please!

So leave it in my comments - let's see who is psychic.....

2nd day of the LAB tomorrow - pray for customers. I leafleted in Dulwich Park all afternoon so I live in hope...

I want to go to bed early but I can't - stupidly put a joint of pork in the oven to cook (only £1.85 in Sainsburys for a massive joint) but it won't be cooked till 11pm (I plan to have it cold tomorrow) and even though my clever cooker will turn itself off at the precise time, it will also beep incredibly loudly to tell me it's done so. So I either go to bed now and get woken up, go downstairs, turn the bloody thing off and go back to bed....or stay awake until the (oh so late) hour of 11 - which for me is an hour past bedtime....

Decisions decisions....

It went ok! (plus a happy surprise)

We only had 2 customers - which is better than none I suppose. They both had a brilliant time -both had treatments - one mum had the full body massage which is our most expensive - but we have lost quite a bit of money - as is to be expected at the beginning.

It was like another trial for us, but one with 3 children in the creche, with creche staff and all facilities. It was really helpful and all we need now is MORE MUMMIES! We're going on a publicity blitz for the rest of the week.

Oz's first day in nursery was a bit eventful - I had to sign the accident book twice on picking him up! He got scratched by another kid (grrr) and then bit his tongue while on the trampoline. He also had to have his top changed after eating soup (hardly surprising!). He seemed quite happy when I picked him up - a bit less cuddly with me in the evening but I think that's tiredness - he didn't sleep - I didn't think he would - they all lie down in one room on floor mats and he's used to either sleeping in his cot or in the car. I thought he'd be a psycho when I picked him up but he just wanted to come home and (surprise surprise) watch Little Einsteins.

Highlight of the day? Picking up the phone this evening and hearing Lesley's voice!! All the way from Dubai - thank you to Skype! It was SO nice to speak to her - I miss her so much. It's hard to believe she's so far away sometimes. She's fine - is going to blog tomorrow she said - has survived her first sandstorm! But all her stuff has arrived so that's cool. It made the day lovely.

I'm exhausted. Stress and stuff I suppose. Early night for me. Then get up, take Oz to nursery, and ideally come back and go back to bed, but I think I've got too much work to do - what with lesson plans for next week's monkey music (including a whole new curriculum) and publicity for LAB - plus I need to edit the website to bring it all up to date. Never stops!

I promised Lesley pictures of my bump so not tonight as I look rough as a badger's bum - but maybe tomorrow when I'm rested (and put some makeup on!)

Argh

LAB launches tomorrow. No time to post really - no time to think just to panic!

Thank you for all the best wishes I've had today by phone, text and email - means a lot.

If I'm not in an asylum I'll post how it went as soon as I can....